Three Years of M’s Kitchen Live

Three years ago today I did that first live video for M’s Kitchen

Wow!

Several media training courses and years of public relations and marketing communications experience and still I was like a cat on a hot tin roof.

This was new territory.

THIS WAS COOKING LIVE

There was nowhere to hide.

If things went wrong, everyone would see it.

Unlike in my day job, there was no production team or PR person behind the scenes checking everything was going to plan. 

THIS WAS SERIOUSLY REAL

As I stood there just before hitting the “go live” button, I felt every ounce of adrenalin jolting through my body.

Somehow a group of single Southern Africans convinced me to demonstrate my dishes live rather than simply sharing my recipes.

This was never my intention.

THREE YEARs REMINDER

Social media is great at reminding you of things.

This morning I was reminded that it has been three years since that first live demonstration.

I had forgotten.

The truth is I was tired.

Tired after working until after 02:30 am this morning editing one of the live demonstrations for sharing on the M’s Kitchen YouTube channel.

The dish was Bobotie – a savoury beef dish with a custard topping.

The Southern African version of a dish like Moussaka – although far nicer in my opinion.

As I was talking through the ingredients, my daughter decided to make an appearance and be part of the show.

She would have been four at the time.

She stirred the ‘brains’ as she called the beef mince, sang “I’m a little teapot”, called me a fatty and pulled my hair. All live, all in real time.

I do not think any key message prep would have prepared me for that happening somehow.

Three years on, I can laugh about it.

Then it was not quite as funny.

EMBRACE THE NEXT THREE YEAR CHALLENGE

The truth is it was nothing I ever really wanted to do.

Not the cooking or baking – this I love.

The fear I guess of being embarrassed and ultimately of failing.

As a PR person, I am used to working on getting things as close to perfect as possible.

In agreeing to cook and bake live, this is like trying to reverse Murphy’s law.

Initially I resisted, I planned and polished.

I got stressed.

Time after time, things would go awry.

• Delays on the train caused by snow;
• broadband deciding to buffer mid-way through a live session,
• my daughter deciding to join the show despite me asking her not to.

I thought I was protecting myself and my loved ones by being in control.

Guess I was wrong.

On some level I did fail. 

I failed in realising that I had an opportunity to change.

Change myself to grow in a new and potentially better direction.

THIS JOURNEY HAS NOT BEEN EASY

Trying to work full time as a single mom with all the parental and financial responsibility, relaxation was something I simply could not afford.

This fear of failing publicly I guess also made me wary.

The stress of the responsibility took its toll and around 2.5 years ago I was diagnosed with a pretty serious B12 deficiency.

THEN LIFE AS WE KNEW IT CHANGED COMPLETELY

I rested for two weeks.

I cannot remember ever doing that before in the 13 years of running my own marketing communications business.

Then I wrote and published a braai book.

It took me four weeks.

Then I realised resting is not something I am used to. Entrepreneurial or stubborn or both – time will tell.

So I relooked at the three things I was doing – writing, marketing communications and cooking.

I turned them upside down while getting my Vitamin D fix in the garden; bit the bullet – wrote a business plan for seed funding and registered M’s Kitchen as a business.

THE NEXT THREE YEARS

Relooking at that video demonstration last night I realised something.

In some ways my fear of failure – some would call this limiting self belief, has kept me safe.

I have been walking, rather than sprinting.

However, I have learned so much albeit more tortoise than hare.

I have much to be grateful for as I embark on this new chapter.

Despite all the challenges and setbacks of the last few years, I have so much love to give.

Love expressed through making and sharing food and stories with people I care about.

I am no longer the scared little M taking centre stage almost against her will three years ago.

My many challenges have made me not only resilient, but aware of the vital importance of not just physical, but mental wellbeing.

The river of passion running through me has finally come into full flow.                                           

I look forward to helping others reignite their passion for food and for life as we explore and grow M’s Kitchen.

Always with the attitude of gratitude firmly front and centre.

Have a great week,

M.